The Home Experience

I truly like my mother in law. I know not many women can say that, but my mother in law has some great qualities, for the most part, she gives her opinion on something we are doing and if she knows I don't like it, she keeps her mouth quiet; she gives her support, even if she doesn't necessarily agree; and she never has tried to get between me and John, not once. She always tells me that she learned from the best because she had a great mother in law.

Anyway I say this all to share something that I found funny. My mother in law keeps her house really nice. Always has since I have known her. Clothes are always washed, folded and put right away, floors vacuumed, beds made, etc. You could go to her house anyday, at anytime of the day and it will be nice.

My house on the other hand is not like that, EVER. If you pop in, you will see a very "lived in house." My house isn't filthy, nasty, etc., but laundry is always needing washed, folded and put away, clutter, toys down, etc. Don't expect a clean house at this Schimek's house.

So for Mother's Day my mother-in-law bought me this book:

When I opened it I wondered what this book would be about, so I started reading it. Right away I could tell that it was a good thing I wasn't one to offended to easily. If most women got a book from their mother in law about keeping a better house, they would be insulted and start getting huffy. I on the other hand just laughed and thought "if she wanted to help me with keeping a cleaner house, she should have stuffed a maid in the bag instead of this book." I know my mother in law meant no nasty things by giving me this book. And it is acutally a good read.

 I have to say it is a good book so far and it has encouraged me to try to be a better housekeeper. One of the chapters talks about having an "also" attitude. The chapter is about how often our attitude is "I have had a long day, I deserve to rest," or "it is not my job to do that, I am not going to do it" and how we should replace it with an attitude of "also" meaning, I am going to wash the dishes and sweep the floor ALSO, I am going to fold the clothes, and put them away ALSO. Of going a step further than we normally do.

It talks about how a home should be a place of rest and peace, which is true, but often with clutter and unclean rooms surrounding us, we don't feel that our house is our place of refuge. Now I do agree for the most part. I would like my house to be cleaner, but it really isnt' the top thing on my list.

So I am going to finish the book and try to implimate some of the tips, but lets face it, my house will probably never be a show house, that you could pop into at any hour and not find stuff out of place. And I am ok with that!!

Little did I know

I remember holding Ryan when he was about 5 months old, hearing about the bizarre circumstances of his birth and the months that followed. Never did I imagine that the truth of his birth and the months that followed was even more bizarre. And that one day this precious child would be living within my home, a part of our family, and looking to us for the stability that he needs and desires.

Please be praying for our family and God's will in this situation. In the next 6-12 months, there will be much stress and big decisions to be made by the state, the courts, Ryan's mom, and us. I am praying that whether Ryan goes home to his mom, stays with us, or even goes to another home that it is God's will. That wherever is his forever home, that it would be a home filled with love, stability, and safety. The kind of home where he is nurtured and his parent/s help him heal from the wounds that has been inflicted on his young heart and soul.

What is a parent?

Sometimes I wonder what makes a parent in people's eyes?

Since having Ryan come to live in our home, my eyes have been opened to a whole new part of the world. A part of the world that I wish I did'nt know about.

Right now I am having a very hard time with the title parent just being thrown around. To me a parent is not necessarily a person that contributed to bringing a child into this world, but someone who puts the child's need before their own. Someone is there to support a child physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. Someone who gives their time and love to showing a kid they are a blessing.

Just because someone created life in a drunken/drug induced act of lust doesn't make a parent. I don't think that a person should be given the right to walk in and out of a child's life whenever is good for them and demand their "rights." What about the child's right to a loving, nurturing home? A stable home with the support they need?

I am just having a hard time with this. Because yes, everyone can make bad decisions from time to time, but there is a HUGE difference between a true parent and a selfish "parent."