Been a good day today. Woke up and made the kids scrambled eggs and then while I washed dishes, they cleaned up their rooms. Then after John got up and around we went to the children's museum. The kids had a blast, but man they need to get something to absorb some of the sound, because with 5 kids running around in there it was very loud!!

Then we went to Wendy's for lunch. After that we ran to Walmart(that part wasn't fun, because I stayed in the car with all 5 kids, it reminded me of when my sister in law would have be tag along to leave me in the car with her kids. lol) so John could get a few groceries. Then we came home and put the younger 3 kids down for naps.

Revelation

Sometimes you come to a place in your life where things that have been right in front of you suddenly come into focus. Today I had one of those days. I was washing dishes while listening to a song that I have heard a million times and one part said something about am I really wanting God's will or am I stuck on my own will or stuck in the middle. I can't remember the exact verses right now, but it just sunk in.

In order to be able to allow God's will to take place in our lives, it requires sacrifice. Sacrificing our dreams and desires and allowing God's to become ours, sacrificing time to spend with God, in His word, and praising him, sacrificing anything that we have allowed to become idols in our lives.

I have to admit these past months I haven't felt as close to God. I have stepped out of the intimacy with Him. And here I am wondering why things seem off. It is because I am not allowing God full access lately.

Some of the reason is all the craziness of having Ryan as our foster child and dealing with all that that entails. But some of it is just that I have gotten hurt and somewhat burned out  from the school and from church and when that happens I pull away from God. It is stupid, but it is the truth.

So tonight I pulled out my Bible, which I am not proud to admit, has not been on my reading list lately, and I sit down before opening to a page and prayed. I prayed that God would guide me, that my will would be His will, and that He would transform my heart and fill me up.

As I sit there praying I could feel God's presense in a way I hadn't taken the time to feel in a long time. I realized our conversations have been one sided lately.

Then I opened my Bible and God guided me to Psalms 9, I believe and His word talked about how God created man just under angels and that He truly cares for us. It spoke to me. That even though I am human, God, the creater Himself, finds me beautiful and worth pursuing.

Easter Weekend

We had a nice Easter weekend.Saturday we ended up dyeing eggs with all the kids. It was fun to see what colors the kids ended up doing and we had some very pretty and colorful eggs after we were all done.

 Sunday we went to church and then went to my inlaw's for lunch, which was good because Pat fixed foods that we were able to eat on our HCG diet. We had a nice lunch and then Pat and I played Spite and Malice which we haven't played in forever, while John and the kids played soccer outside. Then the kids watched Hop and Chipwreck which they recieved as joint gifts for Easter. Bob even took Ryan and Alex for a ride in the ambulance and then they went to Buffalo school for a while and played on the playground. It was a nice and lazy kinda day.